CHICAGO, IL – A decade-long report released Monday by the University of Chicago revealed a majority of Americans who identify as “vocal Second Amendment supporters” are kinda assholes. Proponents of the contentious Second Amendment, which protects a citizen’s right to keep and bear arms for self-defense, were revealed as overwhelmingly asshole-ish in nature, according to the study. “72% [of Second Amendment supporters] are assholes,” the report states, “while only 13% are little pricks, 8% are willingly ignorant, 5% are just fucking creepy, and 2% are active hunters.” The report arrives two weeks after a related study linked aggressive drivers to being really bad in bed.